Get bent

My brother picked me up at 8:15 AM, and we got to the hospital at 8:30, checked in, and waited for the fun to start. During the check in, the woman asked me if I wanted to pay part of the bill today. I said no thanks, I like to wait until they come in the mail and my insurance company has reviewed the claims and gotten a discount for me.  Plus, with all the procedures and surgeries I’ve got going on, I will meet my deductible soon.

They gave me one of those gadgets that you get when you go to busy restaurants, so that they just buzz you when it's your turn. Mine buzzed and they took me back to the “holding tank” at 9:00 and gave me one of my favorite things for the last time, I hope: an IV.  The holding tanks have one wall, which is behind you and curtains which you can draw around you, but of course, you can hear everything around you and everyone there can hear you. A nurse asked me a lot of questions, that I have already answered numerous time, but since no one is talking to anyone else, I had to go through it again. I enjoyed the question asking if I had ever had cancer.  She caught herself right after she asked it and we had a chuckle.  

As luck would have it, the man in the “tank” next to me was a talker, and I got to hear about what was ailing him and his past surgeries and how much beer he drank a day. It was impressive. I think it was a gallon. When they tried to put his IV in, everyone started chattering. “Wow, look at that!  Did you see that? The needle bent! I've never seen that before!”  The woman across from his tank, who was waiting for her son to come out of surgery said, “I could see it from over here. That was something else!” Then the nurses started talking about it, and a new nurse showed up to help. I got my brother to hand me my purse, so I could get out my iPhone and put my earplugs in and listen to the Pandora Blues channel, really loud.  It’s not just that I don’t like getting IVs, but I don’t like hearing about them, especially when things go wrong. My nurse had unknowingly raised my blood pressure when she started telling me that she had found a good vein. I don't want to hear about veins, rolling veins, good veins, or bad veins, either!

I think they started the procedure at 10:00.  I moved myself from my bed to a very narrow table, and they covered me in warm blankets.  The two nurses were very nice, and asked me to join their secret club and put on a light blue cap to cover my hair. They started the meds to put me in some state of not feeling pain and not be totally aware. I think I was out of it for some time, but then I was aware of the doctor doing something on my right upper chest area. I didn’t feel any pain, but I could feel pressure.  I love foreign languages, and I knew my doctor was from Syria, so I said a couple of words to him: Shukran, which means “thank you” and Habibi, which means “my love” or “honey”.  I am not sure, if I used them in a sentence. I was out of the operating room around 11:00.  They fed me in recovery and explained the port to me. I now have a rubber bracelet that says I have a Power Port and a little tag to put on my key chain like a Kroger Plus card. It does not have a bar code on it, so I don’t think it will get me any discounts. I got home around 1:00 PM.

I was very groggy when my brother brought me home, and I went into the sun room to take a nap, until I felt more awake, because I had planned to logon and work from home. I woke up at 4:45, still groggy. I made myself get up and my three dogs were very happy, because they knew dinner might be happening soon.

My chest is sore where they put the port in - it's bigger than I thought, (the port, not my chest!) but it is under the skin.  I think the large bandage which they put on it is pulling my skin, because I feel like I have to tilt my head to the right. I can take the bandage off tomorrow after my shower. I just read the Patient Guide to Power Port, and it is quite helpful. Under the FAQ, most of the answers say, ask your doctor.  The picture on the front of the brochure about it shows a grey haired doctor (I know he’s a doctor because he’s wearing a white coat and has a stethoscope around his neck.) He’s holding the Power Port card and smiling. He's getting ready to hand it to the lucky lady who just had the port put in. He’s smiling because he’s not wearing a Power Port, and he’s going to be paid for putting one in the lucky lady.  For some reason, they are not showing her facial expression.  It looks as if she may be tilting her head to the right.