Hurry up and wait!

My last radiation treatment was on December 4, 2013. Because the radiation keeps working after the treatments end, I must wait to get the CT scans done. I am also waiting to meet with three of my doctors. I'll see Dr. BigHands, the radiation oncologist, on 1/20 for a physical exam. On 1/29, I will get the two CT scans and will meet with my Medical Oncologist to go over the results on 2/3. Then on 2/11, I will meet with the colorectal surgeon to discuss whether the colostomy can be reversed. Radiation can cause the fistula to enlarge, which might make the reversal difficult or impossible. I am reeeealy hoping that the colostomy can be reversed. 

Not much else is going on, I'm just in a healing and waiting mode. I have gone back to the office and am working full-time there. I prefer working from home, but I like being back at work, because there's a group I walk with at lunch, and now I'm able to join them and get some exercise. Last week, I got in 5 days of 10,000 steps/day (5 miles), which I haven't done since I first was diagnosed back in July. This is also good because I get a lot of laughs during our walks. One day, I laughed for about 5 minutes straight, to the point of tears. Even now, when the key words "Come, Follow Me" are spoken, we all laugh. (You had to be there.)

I'm eating okay, but food has lost its appeal. It's nothing to do with the taste, because everything tastes okay. I just have a hard time coming up with foods that sound good. Salads, fish, and beef are on the short list of appealing foods. My sweet tooth has not come back, but I think that's probably okay. 

My hair is coming back, but at a painfully slow rate. I wear a hat most of the time, just because my head gets chilly otherwise. I must have heard 1000 times how lots of people's hair grew back a different color and texture after they had chemo. I can't tell the texture yet, but mine is grey which is what it was before it all fell out. I was hoping for curly red hair. 

I still haven't gained all my weight back, but I'd like to not get to the weight I was previously anyway. I think I'm within 5 pounds of my desired weight. 

I've started reading for pleasure again. After my brother's suicide, I started reading books about suicide and death, and when I was diagnosed, I started reading about cancer and healing. Now I'm reading light and funny novels and would love some book titles, if you have any to suggest. 

I ended the year with another trauma. I was walking my three dogs on our regular route, and we were walking down a small hill when Finn, my Golden boy, decided to do his stop, drop, and roll at my feet. He does this 5 or 6 times when we get to the grassy area, but usually, he is on my side or far enough in front that I can stop. This time, I couldn't stop, and I also had some momentum from the other two dogs pulling me downhill on their leashes. So, I catapulted head first into the ground - my arms were out at my sides holding the leashes. I landed on my nose and was wearing sunglasses which dug into the bridge of my nose. I heard a crunching sound in my neck. I had grass in my mouth. After I composed myself, I rolled over and sat up. I felt my teeth with my tongue to see if they were all still there and in one piece. My teeth were fine. I sat there for a bit and saw the three dogs in front of me, still on their leashes. Finn was behind Shelby and his expression said "I have no idea what just happened." Shelby came up and licked me on the face. I think she "got it." Tess also looked bewildered. We continued on the walk. I wish I had a video of the free fall, because I am sure it was funny. 

I was happy to see 2014, although I didn't ring it in. I'm hoping for a better year and getting good CT scans and reversing the colostomy would be a great start. Wish me luck!