Tuesday, September 10, 2013

Round 2 or Mass in the Ass can kiss his ass goodbye or Mass in the Ass can eat sh*t and die

In this corner, weighing in at 130 pounds, formerly 149 pounds, bald and pale, the challenger, Nasty Nan. And in the other corner, weighing in at an unknown number, but being a very large tumor, the defender, squamous cell carcinoma of the anus, also known as cancer or Mass in the Ass. 

Nasty Nan has worked up a strategy with her trainers, the colorectal surgeon and chemo and radiation oncologists. She has a colostomy - to divert the waste from the fistula - which can hopefully be reversed next year. She has undergone one round of aggressive chemotherapy and is currently getting the second round - both done inpatient - to reduce Mass in the Ass to a weak, helpless, minuscule blob, if there is even anything left after Round 2. In the process, she will also be weakened, but during the following few weeks, she will gradually rebuild her strength, get her blood levels back up, and be ready for additional chemo and radiation for 5 weeks. The chemo will make her body more receptive to the radiation and will be administered outpatient in the 1st and 4th weeks as well as via a pump for 96 hours. The radiation will get rid of any remaining cancer. Because she's part of a clinical trial with T.I.P, and because the other people in the clinical trials who had T.I.P had metastasized cancer and were not able to get additional chemo and radiation, she is a guinea pig. She wants to win this fight against Mass in the Ass, so she's taking a chance to get a shot (actually, she's had many shots, but they've all been via her port) at a cure.

Mass in the Ass is a weaselly, sneaky, chicken shit tumor which apparently started in Nasty Nan's rectum and pushed through to the vagina wall, causing a fistula in the process. Mass in the Ass was hoping to keep growing and go unnoticed, but Nasty Nan found out and is fighting back. Nasty Nan may be bald and skinny and tired, but don't count her out. Her Dad was a lawyer whose nickname was "Battler Brown," and the apple did not fall far from the tree. Not only does she have a good team and winning strategy to knock out Mass in the Ass, but she also has lots of supporters cheering her on. Her family has been and continues to be there for her with whatever she needs. Friends are donating time, food, and money to her recovery. And they are visiting, calling, emailing, sending cards and gifts, and posting messages of encouragement, prayers, good wishes, good vibes, and love on Facebook. All this support makes a formidable army, and Mass in the Ass is no match and is in deep doo-doo, at least figuratively, now that Nasty Nan has a colostomy.

No comments:

Post a Comment

Thanks for your message. It will be reviewed and posted if deemed appropriate and less offensive than the blog is.